William Asks:
My wife goes out the bar and when she come draggin in in the wee hours of the morning she always wakes me up and starts shit with me. She likes to let me know what a piece of shit I am and how many guys hit on her and want to fuck her or that she made out with. II tell her to shut up and go to sleep but that don’t work at all. She likes to drive me over the edge. (I’m no women beater) but I end up grabbin her by her throat and makin her shut up. I think she likes it when I get that pissed and get rough with her.The next morning she always says that she’s sorry and that she didn’t make out with no one that she was trying to hurt me. When I’m out of town I forbid her to go out and well you can only guess that she does it anyway. I’ve bout had enough of it. It pushes me over the edge enough to be done with her. The only thing that holds us together is we have kids and I don’t want them raised by someone else or them not being a big part of my life full time. She’ll end up hurting me that way I’m sure. What do you think she is trying to prove to me? Do you think it is that she likes to be ruffed up?I feel that she is fucking around on me but I can’t be sure she always says that she won’t and has never.
Dear William,
I understand the fears of losing your kids but unless you have done something to prove that you are not worthy of your children then you need to make a change. LEAVE YOUR WIFE! I’m totally for marriage and for what it stands for. I believe in true love, love at first site, growing love. But I also believe that love can fade as your marriage has. For you to sit by and get abused mentally and verbally is not healthy by any means. You can agree or disagree but that is what is happening to you. Also, if she is able to push you to grabbing her by the throat in anger then you may at some point lose control and end up doing much worse. You shake your head now that you’d never do such a thing.
Do your homework first before you file for a divorce. I know from my own personal experience in the state of California, if you get 50% custody neither of you have to pay for child support. That is the part that will kill you both if you split. Create a schedule that allows for her to party. Don’t screw yourself though. At some point you will want to start dating and will need to have a night that you can do that.
I don’t know if you have already grabbed your balls to talk to her about how you feel. If you have and you have requested couseling for you both then i’m not sure what else to suggest but moving on. She sounds as if she is needing something from you and she is unable to get it. Or the other side may be that you had children before she was mentally ready to let go of her free life of party party party and has decided to rebel like a child.
Either way get over the fear of your children having a different life and how unfair it is to them. They will be much happier when both their parents are in happier healthier homes. It takes time but it is totally worth it.
Kisses,
Ask Naughty Nikki
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